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Why the Dog Keeps Chewing My Socks
The same bacteria
responsible for making Muenster cheese
are the primary parasites
that make your feet
smell like feet
They are not alone
Of the host
of secondary and tertiary
bacteria and fungi
also making short work
of sweat and dead skin
Most are also used
in cheese-making
This is why your feet smell like cheese
Mammary glands
are modified sweat glands
so
one might say milk
is modified sweat
or
the other way around
Toe cheese is real
While I am generally not fond
of the odor of feet
I should say
they do not all smell the same
Each with its unique melange
of decomposers
and products of metabolism
My favorite cheese is Double Gloucester
When I asked
the man at the cheese counter
why they call it “double” Gloucester
he told me
It’s because the cheese wheels
are twice as tall.
This makes perfect sense
It is also not accurate
I can taste the difference
between single and double Gloucester
as easily as I can
between havarti and Swiss
There is a subtle
and not so subtle
distinctive tang and bite
a warm and heavy musk
created no other way
This is why I close the bedroom door
Because the dog
knows the pungency
of my artisanal feet
pulls them gently
from the laundry pile
and tears them to shreds
on the living room carpet
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